<< :
2003-10-28 @ 10:04 p.m. : >>
Back To The Grindstone
Oh help! How can I develop some enthusiasm for this place? How can I give this experience some meaning?
I guess I spoke too soon. Just two days after Fall Break, I feel like I am back to the same monotonous schedule of reading journal article after journal article, wading through dull statistics, feeling frustrated by lack of time, going to bed feeling fed up and saturated, living for June.....
This isn't right. I shouldn't be living for June. I should be living for the present.
Maybe it's time to accept that this isn't for me. I have been here 8 weeks now. I had hoped that this experience would change me. Instead I find myself desperately seeking ways to change my own relation to my surroundings.
I feel stuck. I want to make this a good year but I genuinely don't see how right now. I continue to be preoccupied with longings for other times and other places. Same old story really.
Back To The Grindstone
Oh help! How can I develop some enthusiasm for this place? How can I give this experience some meaning?
I guess I spoke too soon. Just two days after Fall Break, I feel like I am back to the same monotonous schedule of reading journal article after journal article, wading through dull statistics, feeling frustrated by lack of time, going to bed feeling fed up and saturated, living for June.....
This isn't right. I shouldn't be living for June. I should be living for the present.
Maybe it's time to accept that this isn't for me. I have been here 8 weeks now. I had hoped that this experience would change me. Instead I find myself desperately seeking ways to change my own relation to my surroundings.
I feel stuck. I want to make this a good year but I genuinely don't see how right now. I continue to be preoccupied with longings for other times and other places. Same old story really.